Thursday, December 10, 2009

Best Lesbian Erotica 2009

Best Lesbian Erotica 2009
Being a writer of high-quality smut myself, I love really good dirty stories.

Tristan Taormino's Best Lesbian Erotica 2009 anthology marks her last year as editor of the series, and she has ended her tenure with an amazing collection of hot erotica. Some of these stories are so intense, touching or thought-provoking that they have burned themselves into my brain, and I find myself going back and reading them over and over again. "Dream Date" by Radclyffe features one of the sweetest, yet incredibly hot, pay-for-sex scenes I have ever read. Teresa Noelle Roberts' "Tough Enough To Wear A Dress" is, hands down, my favourite piece in the book, providing wonderful insight as to why one of the characters has panic attacks when confronted with feminine clothes. These are only two of the two dozen pieces in the book and no matter what you are looking for, I am positive you will find at least one story that makes you weak-kneed.

One interesting point worth noting is most of the stories deal with butch-femme, BDSM or strap-on sex, and in many cases all three at once. "On Snow-White Wings" by Shanna Germain is the only pure vanilla story in the collection that comes to mind and actually sticks out noticeably. The story is sweet, emotional and sensual and acts like a summer afternoon rain shower -- cooling and refreshing -- allowing the temperature to build once again in the second half of the book.

Being of the male gender, I'm not sure if I am the most appropriate person to review a fabulous book of lesbian erotica but I am very glad to be given the chance to dive into a world where the lesbians aren't all lipstick, the bois have more between their legs than I do and the passion is honest and true.

~ Maximilian Lagos

Here's what Babeland has to say:

We don’t know how, but the bestselling Best Lesbian Erotica series manages to get hotter every year, and 2009 is no exception. Beloved sex educator/director/author Tristan Taormino puts together another winning collection, taking us along for sexy trysts at the bar, the beach, the tattoo parlor, and the public park (to name just a few). Desire knows no bounds here in the world of handsome butches, flirtatious femmes, and every lezzy in between and beyond. No matter what gets you going, from sweet seductions to hardcore fucking to envelope-pushing power dynamics, you’ll find erotic satisfaction here.
  • Binding Style: Paperback
  • Type: Erotica
  • Number of Pages: 302
  • Copyright: 2008

Monday, November 30, 2009

Tenga Squeeze Play

Tenga Squeeze PlayEnvironmental concerns aside, the concept of disposable sex toys makes a lot of sense, especially masturbators for men. No muss, no fuss, just pop the cap back on when you are done and into the garbage it goes. And the Tenga Squeeze Play, in addition to being one use, is one of the best masturbation toys I have ever tried.

Physically, it resembles a freakishly large tube of toothpaste. Tenga also didn't bother trying to make the opening look anatomical, opting instead for a simple hole. The entire design of the product is very purpose oriented, which is really what men look for when we need to get off solo. It is even prelubricated which makes things VERY convenient. But that is just packaging, the real magic is on the inside.

The inside of the tube is nicely form fitting and lined with tiny knobs to add to the sensation. There is a small hole in the top which easily controls the suction and pressure inside the tube but which also leads to some amusing squishing and farting noises. Overall however, it was still a pretty insignificant distraction. The sensation will never fool you into thinking you are making whoopie to another human being, but it still felt very good and was more than capable of completing its task.

Overall, the Squeeze Play is almost perfect. Almost.

The biggest drawback would be the price. For a disposable item, it should be cheap but the prices I have seen online, although not as much as a Fleshlight, for example, are still much too high for a throw away. Until the price comes down, I am afraid for me anyway, the Tenga Squeeze Play will remain a novelty as opposed to a temporary, but replenished, resident of my toy chest.

~ Maximilian Lagos

Tenga Squeeze Play

Here's what Babeland has to say:
You’ll be entering (get it?) a whole new realm of masturbation sleeves when you try Tenga Squeeze Play. As soon as you touch the inner ribs and bumps and feel the glorious suction, there’ll be no turning back. Tenga has custom-engineered a line of men’s products based on extensive product testing and feedback from a veritable army of volunteers, so it’s no wonder that this toy provides a solo sexual experience like no other toy we’ve encountered. Your choice of two sizes and how tight you squeeze on the Tenga determines the tightness of the ride. Tenga products are disposable, pre-lubricated, and designed for one-time use.
  • Size: 6” x 2”; 7” x 2-1/2” (internal)
  • Material: ABS and TPE plastic
  • Lube Ingredients: Water, Propylene Glycol, Hydroxyl Ethyl Cellulose, Sodium Polyacrylate, Phenoxyethanol, IPBC, Paraben

Sunday, November 29, 2009

Truth or Dare

Truth or DareMaybe it is because we are old. Or maybe it is because we have been together for a million years. Or maybe my wife and I have actually had every conversation a married couple can have. Well, for whatever reason, Truth or Dare: A Game of Passion by Chronicle Books didn't teach us anything new about ourselves or each other. We did end the night having great sex, but I don't think it had much to do with the game.

A couple glasses of wine might have shifted our mood a little bit or made the cutsie-worded Dares easier to get into. For a game dealing with such mature topics, the language used on the cards did not do anything to set a sexy mood... made me actually feel like I was back in grade school, way too nervous to ask my crush to the Friday night dance.

The Truth cards were far more interesting than the Dare. So after a few minutes, we just boxed the Dares and took turns reading each other the Truths. We laughed quite a bit and made up some more silly than sexy answers, both agreeing the Truth side was good but could be even better with a group of people playing and again, several bottles of wine.

I did offer to send the game to a friend who is looking to reconcile with her husband. In a recent conversation, one of her fantasies was revealed to a surprised: "I didn't think you would be into that." It might be just the thing she needs to break the ice and open those lines of communication again. New couples would probably have fun with Truth or Dare, too, loosening inhibitions because "the cards told us to."

Personally, I am going to stick with Strip Poker and Spin The Bottle.

~ Maximilian Lagos

Here's what Good Vibrations has to say:
Think Truth or Dare went out of the style after High School? Well think again with this stylish and sexy version of an old classic great for couples (or adventurous groups). Explore your inhibitions or share some sexy secrets with the 100 game cards and a roll of the die as you take turns revealing your favorite sex toy or demonstrating your hottest sexual position. The questions are smart and sexy and the dares are really fun. Whether rain or shine, you might want to start spending every day indoors.

6 ¼” x 5 x 1 ¾” box.
Includes 100 game cards, one die, and instructions.

Saturday, November 28, 2009

Spartacus Alligator Nipple Clamps

Crocodile ClampsI have never had sensitive nipples. Gentle rubbing feels okay, but any real amount of pressure and I just stop feeling altogether. It didn’t even really hurt when I got my left one pierced.

But, I LOVE playing with other people’s nipples. They are a primary target for my tongue, fingers, and clothespins on lovers and playmates. So, the chance to play with a set of Spartacus Alligator Nipple Clamps was pretty exciting.

My wife was eager to try them too, but when I stalked across the bedroom floor, opening and closing the alligator-style clips like hungry little metal mouths, she rolled over onto her belly and wouldn’t let me anywhere near The Girls. Her nipples are oversensitive on the best of days, and the thought of the chained clamps biting down on her tender bits was making them hide in the mattress.

Sadly, her instincts were correct. To keep the clamps with their rubber coated teeth actually on her nipples, they had to be tightened well past her comfort point. Anything less and they would fall off with the slightest movement. And there was NO way we were taking off the rubber coating and subjecting ourselves to the razor-sharp teeth.

They were a bit pinchy even on my small, numb nubbins but they did hold better on mine than hers. The set screw used to hold the clips open didn’t want to budge under pressure, so adjustment meant taking them off, backing the screw off, and clamping them back on… usually to have them fall off again.

If you enjoy nipple torture and have a bit of experience, you may like the Spartacus Alligator Nipple Clamps. I will bring them to my next fetish party and use them mercilessly on my date for the evening. But if you are new to clamps, these may be more of a frustration than a fantasy.

~ Maximilian Lagos

Here's what Babeland has to say:
Enjoy a tantalizing pinch on your nipples, labia, or anywhere else with the sturdy, adjustable Crocodile Clamps. The slender tips deliver localized pressure, and the screw allows you to adjust the pressure with one hand tied behind your back (or otherwise occupied!). Go as light or as tight as you choose – you’ll be surprised at how pleasurable and intoxicating the sensation can be when you’re in the heat of the moment. Take nipple play to a whole new level with this Babeland classic.

* Size: 17” (LOA)
* Material: Metal and soft plastic

Friday, October 23, 2009

Floggers in Time Magazine?

You could've knocked me over with a feather when I saw the article. I guess sex toys have finally reached mainstream media, even if the hook was environmental.

Check it out. :-)

peace and passion,

~ Alessia

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Seven Minutes in Heaven

Seven Minutes in Heaven“Reality porn is coming out of the closet in this first ever gonzo queer film.”

That's what the website says. I won't argue with the reality part, 'cause it doesn't appear there's much scripting, but gonzo? I wouldn't call it gonzo. Gonzo, to me, means there's nothing other than the sex of interest. This is more like documentary porn -- a la Comstock Films (but more hedonistic and minus the love). Each of the cast speaks to the camera for a few seconds, sharing their experiences or expectations. I truly enjoyed this aspect... and would've enjoyed it even more if I didn't have to struggle to hear what they were saying. (The sound, not to put too fine a point on it, sucked. And the soundtrack wasn't much better. Seems that sound -- other than the moaning and grunting -- isn't high on the priority list of production values for porn. Pity.)

Not quite sure where the title came from unless it's just an extension of the two party games (Truth or Dare and Spin the Bottle) briefly played on screen. The subtitle "Coming Out" is also misleading. A couple of the women say it's their first experience with a woman and their first experience on camera. That's a cherry-popper, not a coming out.

The bodies aren't plastic or perfect, which is wonderful. Plastic/perfect is the main reason I just can't embrace traditional porn. It fucks with my feelings about my own body -- and I struggle with that quite enough with my clothes ON. I don't need it shoved in my face when I'm naked.

So, the sex scenes? They're... interesting. Some are kinda hot. Some, I suppose, would find certain elements kinky or transgressive. The orgasms appear to be genuine, too. Perhaps I'm jaded, but when you can sit in bed with your partner and watch other people having sex for almost 2 hours without it resulting in your own uncontrollable mattress aerobics... well, the sex you're watching is just not THAT hot. I mean, yeah,  it turned me on. And, yeah, we played... but after we finished watching, not during. Maybe that just makes me a conscientious reviewer. Ya think?

Bottom line: I don't regret the time I spent watching this film, but it's not one I'm likely to re-watch, either. As always, YMMV.

peace and passion,

Here's what Good Releasing has to say:
Reality porn is coming out of the closet in this first ever gonzo queer film. Award-winning director Courtney Trouble invites 7 diverse, fresh-faced performers to a kinky slumber-party for fun and games… only tonight there are no rules, no limits and no bedtime! The amateur cast picks their own partners, their own sex toys and their own ways of getting off. Spin the Bottle inspires an unscripted fuck-fest and first-time fantasies come true during a Truth or Dare strap-on sex scene. With honest video confessions, authentic orgasms and natural bodies, Seven Minutes in Heaven is the real queer deal.

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

P Style

When I saw this product listed for review, I pounced on it like a fat kid hits cake. Ladies, how many times have you stopped at a seedy-looking gas station with a near-bursting bladder only to discover a disgusting restroom? I mean, you don't even want to wash your hands in the sink much less put your sweet pink parts in the vicinity of the commode!

The package says...

Easy to use while clothed

Eliminates the need for T.P.

Reusable & simple to clean

Compact & easy to carry

And I'd agree with 62.5% of these claims. First, being the clean freak that I am, I don't think anything will ever eliminate the need to WIPE (and not merely with toilet tissue). I want to be in delightfully lickable condition 24/7. Don't you? The half-agreement is for the "easy to use while clothed" statement. It *IS* easy to use. However, "while clothed" is pushing it.

Yes, I believe it's entirely possible to develop a comfort & skill level with the P Style that would enable it to be used through one's open fly. I just don't see myself needing to use it often enough to achieve that level of proficiency. So, I drop trough.

I don't know about you, but I never mastered the whole squatting thing. By the time I relax enough to let things... um... flow, my thighs are trembling and a sheen of sweat is coating my brow. It's that level of proficiency thing again. I don't need to squat-and-pee often enough to become a pro.

As for the P Style, I tested it 3 times -- in 3 different situations -- before penning judgment. The first time, it took a loooooooooong time before I could relax enough to pee. Ever squatted behind a tree on a camping trip while mosquitos bit your ass waiting for your muscles to cooperate?  Same thing. It was the I-don't-want-to-piss-on-myself reflex. Once things started moving, it was a fascinating experience. Surreal, almost.

The second time, I'd had a couple drinks (as well as the previous confidence-building experience), and I got right to it. Um, too much so. Apparently, enthusiastic urination exceeds the capacity of its channel... and I gave too much too fast. Okay, messy lesson learned.

Third time's the charm. It was this trial that convinced me that utter proficiency is not only possible, but probable with semi-regular use. I think the P Style could be a wonderful gadget for many applications: camping, nasty public restrooms, physical impairments.  My P Style is going into the glove compartment of my car, and when I need it, I'm going to be damned glad it's there!

Until next time...

peace and passion,

Here's what Babeland has to say:
Anyone who’d like to pee standing up (and that’s a whole lot of people!) will find the P Style useful. This compact and convenient “Stand To Pee” device, or STP, works perfectly for outdoor recreation and work, travel, folks with physical restrictions, female-to-male transsexuals, people who’ve had surgery that interferes with their ability to pee standing up, men with hypospadias… basically, anyone who wants to pee standing up, but whose anatomy or circumstance has kept them from doing so! It can be used through an open zipper with the user fully clothed, and the back edge can be used in place of toilet paper. Best of all, it’s made from nonporous hard plastic, so it’s easy to clean, completely reusable, and long-lasting. Color may vary.
  • Size: 7-1/2” x 1-1/2” x 3/4"
  • Material: Hard plastic

Monday, September 14, 2009

G-Twist Vibe

G-Twist Vibe
The first full day of football season provided an ideal time for toy testing, since I'm not a fan -- and my partner is. I just wish I had a better report on this product.  Alas, the one received for review was inoperable. I tried several different sets of batteries in every permutation to no avail. Therefore, this review will simply deal with the product as a dildo as opposed to a vibrator. I will assume that the strength of the vibration is similar (if not identical) to another Fun Factory product, The Boss, which I reviewed here some time ago.

The G-Twist is like The Boss in terms of its battery compartment and controls. I seriously dislike this aspect of its design. Not only is it confusing (and completely lacking "How To" instructions), it is physically difficult to open. If you have any impairment in finger/grip strength, forget about it!

It's longer and girthier than it appears in the pictures, but not uncomfortably so with appropriate lubrication.

Where the G-Twist differs is its ridges. While I didn't really care for the little ones along its length, the bigger, clit-bumping ridge certainly hits the sweet spot. There's enough flexibility in the silicone shaft to bend it to provide dual stimulation -- inside and out. It would've been nice to do so with vibration, but... oh, well.

Until next time...

peace and passion,

Here's what Good Vibrations has to say:
This Good Vibes staff-designed toy embodies a virtual wish list of nearly all the vibrator features we love. It's got a G-spot curve; substantial-yet-subtle texture along the shaft; a strategically placed clit ridge; water-resistant design; a top-quality, velvety smooth silicone body; reliable, quiet motor and a convenient ergonomic dial at the base to control the variable-speed vibrations. And oh yeah, it's one good-looking toy.
  • 6 long, 1 1/2 in diameter.
  • Uses two AA batteries (included).
  • Now available in Black and Raspberry, as well as our classic colors Dark blue, Purple, Baby blue, or Candy Pink.
  • Volume: 2; Intensity: 3.
  • Care and Cleaning: This nonporous vibrator can be washed with a mild soap and water. It can be immersed in water for ease of cleaning, but be careful to keep the battery compartment closed and dry.

Wednesday, July 29, 2009

The Joy of Sex Toys

From AlterNet:
Better adult stores now all take products out of the boxes and putting them right into customer's hands so they'll know what kind of bangs they'll get for their bucks. And the buzz on vibrators, culturally and in real life, has gone from a whisper to a joyous scream.

If Apple's approval of a vibrator app for the iPhone wasn't enough, the embrace of the once-shunned sex aid was recently confirmed by two studies from the University of Indiana (on one men, one on women), which found that 53 percent of women and 45 percent of the men between 18 and 60 have used vibrators and that those who had were more apt to safeguard their sexual health.

Female vibrator users were more likely to have had gynecological exams in the last year or to have performed breast self exams in the last month. Recent male users were more like to have performed a testicular self-exam and scored themselves higher in most of the five domains of sexual function (erectile function, orgasmic function, sexual desire, intercourse satisfaction and overall satisfaction).

There was no significant difference in vibrator use between men who identified as straight and those who identified as gay or bisexual. The study, which queried 2,056 women and 1,047 men, is the first to publish nationally representative data on vibrator use and was funded by Church & Dwight Co. Inc, makers of Trojan products (condoms, pleasure rings, etc).

When you consider the stigmas vibrators held in the past, this rate of use isn't just a jump, it's a shuttle launch. Writing in the New York Times about the Indiana study, Michael Winerip notes that vibrator use was cited as "not appreciable" by an Alfred Kinsey report in 1953 and "less than 1 percent" by Shere Hite in 1976.

A subsequent 1992 survey from the University of Chicago said that only 2 percent of women had bought a vibrator in the past year. Even recognizing that "bought" and "used" are significantly different, for the numbers to shoot that high that quickly represents a significant change in our attitude toward sexual pleasure.

Read the entire article.

Friday, July 24, 2009

Just Leave a Comment to Enter

This fearless reviewer's toy drawer spilleth over, as you can see from an earlier post. Thus, I'm entering this contest for the Toys for Tarts' faithful (but heretofore lurking) readers. In other words, YOU! All of the products listed below are already in my toy drawer, and most have been reviewed here. So, if Toys for Tarts wins, I'll be giving them all away!

To play along & be eligible to win one of the fabulous wishlist products below or one of the weekly $25 Babeland gift cards, you just gotta leave a comment on this post. Tell me which wishlist product you'd like to have & why -- or which product you wish was included on the list & why. Be creative! Be naughty! I won't tell a soul.

Plus, if this blog gets the mostest comments, not only will Toys for Tarts receive a $125 gift card, but one of the lucky commenters will as well. Nothing to lose and all kinds of pleasure to gain!

So, without further ado, here is Toys for Tarts' $500 Babeland wishlist:

SaSi ($148)
It's a programmable tongue coupled with vibration. WIN-WIN!

Delight ($130)
Aptly named, but I call it Shamu. (Reviewed HERE.)

Use it solo... or with a partner... or both.

Njoy Fun Wand ($88)
Stainless steel sex -- hot or cold, it's spectacular!

TOTAL: $496


peace & passion,

Thursday, July 23, 2009

InfraRed Massager (CalEx)

InfraRed Massager (CalEx)Not exactly sure how to tell whether this Hitachi wannabe from California Exotic Novelties is truly infrared, or if it's just lit with LEDs behind a red plastic cover like my car's brake lights. But, really, until there's a solid reason to care, it doesn't matter. This is a nice product that does indeed give Hitachi's Magic Wand a run for its money.

The "InfraRed Electric Massager" has two speeds (high/low) which correspond to the inverse low/high heat. High heat is not all that hot, incidentally. Just noticeably warmer than low. One side of the bulbous head lights & heats, while the other hosts one of the 5 massage attachments. I tried each for actual massage of stiff/sore muscles, where they performed admirably, and I tried a couple of them for pleasure purposes. However, I much preferred the heated side over the attachments for stimulation of my sensitive pink parts.

The power cord is identical in length (6') to the Hitachi, which is the next best thing to cordless/rechargeable, and it's sized comparably. The vibration strength isn't quite as powerful as its famous cousin, but it gets the job done -- and it's a wee bit quieter.

So, all in all, I'd give this puppy two thumbs up. If it were significantly cheaper than a Hitachi, I'd be really impressed.

Until next time...

peace & passion,

Friday, July 03, 2009

Lockable sex toy case (BMS Enterprises)

I have an underbed gun case -- big, metal drawer with a keyed lock -- that I use for my sex toys. It's about five feet long and two feet wide, six inches deep. See?

the drawer
That's an old photo, too. It's much fuller now, and I don't even have all my favorite stuff in it. The "go to" toys are within arm's reach of my bed, in the top drawer of the nightstand (like my Hitachi) or even on its surface (like a couple bottles of lube and Shamu). That's all nice & handy for bedroom use. However, sometimes a perv needs to take her toys on the road.

Lockable sex toy caseI figured this lockable sex toy case from BMS Enterprises would be just the thing. I was wrong. Yeah, it's cute. (Purple sparkly butterflies ARE cute.) And it's discreet. It's also junk. The lock mechanism is clunky, and the hinges are weak. There is no key backup, so if you forget (or screw up) the combination, you're shit-outta-luck. Your sex toys could be *gasp* prisoners! Plus it's way smaller than it appears. My gun case looks much smaller in the photo than it actually is. The same is true for this product. Even though I clicked the "view actual size" link, I really didn't have a good grasp of the size until it arrived. You can see it below with my cell phone for scale:

Put a single hefty dildo & harness combination in here, and that's IT. Nothing else will fit. Although the lock doesn't function properly, I think my daughter will probably end up using this as a makeup or nail polish case. That's about all it's good for. If you want to haul your toys around, get something else.

Until next time...

peace & passion,

Thursday, July 02, 2009


MiaAbout twice the size of a standard lipstick, this little USB-rechargeable number is a delightfully discreet and surprisingly powerful multi-speed vibrator from LELO. It's attractively packaged, making it an ideal gift for a friend, and the pink model is currently on sale for less than half price ($29.99) at Babeland -- so you can grab one for yourself as well.

It looks like a big flash drive when charging on my laptop (rather than a pleasure tool). I counted four intensities of vibration, accessed by successively pressing the "+" pad, followed by three pulsing speeds. It's volume is about the same as a bullet vibe, but it has considerably more oomph (and none of those annoying button batteries). I can even charge it in my car 'cause I have one of those USB power converter gadgets.

I'm not typically a fan of small, clitoral vibrators -- preferring either (a) more powerful vibration a la Hitachi or (b) penetration a la Delight -- but the little MIA combines so many convenient features that I think it will remain in my purse for those need-to-come-now emergencies. :)

Until next time...

peace & passion,

The manufacturer's site says:
MIA is a discreet pleasure object carefully designed to combine versatility and convenience, intended for private enjoyment at all times. This elegant lipstick vibrator nestles seductively in your handbag, her size and chargeability making her available whenever needed, whether on a long intercontinental flight or during a break on a busy day. Glossy and attractive, MIA's intuitive interface and four stimulation modes allow total control in the midst of ecstasy. She is rechargeable and a 2-hour charge provides up to 4 hours of bliss. Comes presented in an elegant gift box, accessorised with extension cord for USB charging, manual and a 1-year LELO warranty.
And here's what Babeland has to say:

Make room in your laptop bag for the Mia, a powerful lipstick-sized vibrator that can charge directly from your computer thanks to its USB extension. Mia holds a charge for four hours, making it one of the most travel-friendly toys we’ve seen. Mia’s proof that small scale doesn’t mean skimping on features, elegance, or performance. The faceted, lipstick-sized shell comes swathed in body-friendly silicone, making it a breeze to clean, and features four vibration modes to choose from. A USB extension cord is also included, so you can hide Mia discreetly while charging. Stash Mia in your bag, purse or pocket and pleasure is sure to follow wherever you go. Made by Lelo.

  • Size: 4-2/5” x 4/5”
  • Material: Silicone coated hard plastic
  • Volume: 1 out of 5
  • Intensity: 3 out of 5
  • Batteries: Rechargeable

Monday, June 29, 2009


BootieThe Bootie (by Fun Factory) is a 100% silicone, velvety textured, creatively shaped butt plug that provides comfortable stimulation for the anal beginner. The head is slightly larger than a man’s thumb, while the shaft is about as thin as a pinky finger. Curving slightly in a “come here” gesture, the Bootie’s shape and flexibility can make it a bit tricky to insert the first time. It is very comfortable to wear for play, but the larger safety bottom is uncomfortable to sit upon, making it less than ideal for longer term wear.

Touted as delivering “rapturous pleasure” by the manufacturer, this reviewer was not rewarded with such outstanding responses. The comfortable flexibility minimized the stimulation to the prostate as compared to such products as the Aneros or manual self-stimulation. There are better prostate toys on the market, but as a basic butt plug for safe play, the Bootie delivers in spades.

~ A.B. Guye

Here's what Babeland has to say:

Shake your booty all night long with the beginner-friendly Bootie anal plug. Insertion is easy thanks to the firm, tapered tip; and once in place, the pliable neck, tapered base and soft silicone make wearing the Bootie all pleasure. The curved base helps ‘rock’ the Bootie for gentle prostate stimulation, and squeezing the resilient shaft with anal muscles amps up the sensation. It's bootie-licious! Brought to you by Fun Factory. Color may vary. For a discount, check out the Bootie Plug & Sliquid Sassy Booty Formula Combo.

Saturday, June 27, 2009

Shunga Secret Garden

Shunga Secret GardenShunga Secret Garden
Shunga Secret Garden is primarily billed as an arousal enhancer. It contains L-Arginine, which is a non-essential amino acid that is often used in combination with yohimbine to treat erectile dysfunction. L-Arginine is necessary for the synthesis of nitric oxide, a vasodilator and critical ingredient in pharmaceuticals such as Viagra. As for the other active ingredients, "Turnera aphrodisiaca" is another term for damiana, a common herbal aphrodisiac.

The flavor is listed as "undefined," but it's clearly peppermint with soapy undertones. (The scent is powerfully peppermint. I could smell it upon opening the box in which it was shipped.) The type is listed as "cream," but it's actually a clear gel liquid.

The product's URL places it in the "sex-lubricants/ arousal-lubes" category, but I wouldn't necessarily call it a lubricant. Yes, it's slippery, but internal use could be uncomfortable given the "mentha piperita" ingredient. In addition, it contains glycerin (a sugar alcohol) and, while it does not "feed the bacteria that form plaques and cause dental cavities," there are anecdotal reports of its association with yeast infections. Thus, I avoid internal use of products containing sweeteners of any kind.

External use, on the other hand, is quite delightful. While this product won't create arousal where none exists, it does indeed serve to enhance sensation. It's not overwhelmingly strong on your soft pink parts, as is the off-label use of, say, Perma Frost Schnapps. I think the "mentha piperita" (peppermint) would probably accomplish the same without the added damiana and amino acids, though -- kinda like Altoids, but slippery. YMMV.

Until next time...

peace & passion,

Thursday, June 18, 2009

Weatherproof (brand) USB Massager

USB MassagerIt's kinda unfair to review a product when I can't find a link for its purchase, but *shrug* I picked up this little number on a whim at the Charm City Fetish Fair, and I gotta tell ya, it's a keeper. Two speeds (high & low), not too loud, plugs into computer's USB port. There are nubbies on the (curved) long underside as well as on the end, so it functions well with point-on-clit or nestled between the labia.

I wish I could find a link, 'cause I think this is full of win for cyberers.

Until next time...

peace & passion,

Friday, June 12, 2009


It's a Twitter contest/giveaway! Reviewer Epiphora is giving away two brand new bumpy glass dildos. Simply tweet the following to enter:
RT @Epiphora: I’m giving away a set of two bumpy glass dildos! Retweet to enter. Rules + picture:
Good luck!

peace & passion,

Monday, June 08, 2009

PSA: Making Her Come

Ten minutes of hands-on (and mouth-on) instruction. Totally NOT WORK SAFE (as if anything here is).

peace & passion,

Saturday, June 06, 2009

Champion (DVD)

ChampionI haven't had much luck (I typed "lick" the first time. It's hardwired.) with DVDs reviewed here--the exception being Bill & Desiree, but that almost doesn't count 'cause the documentary-style Comstock Films are in a league of their own. Man's Ruin was too weird for words, and Annie Sprinkle... well, let's just say she must be an acquired taste.

I was hoping Champion would turn the tide. Instead, I'm afraid it just set the porn bar too high. There is a real plot in this 90-minute flick, though having read the storyline on the website prior to watching made it easier to grok 'cause the limited dialog sounded muffled. (A couple times, we backed up the DVD to listen again.) It's got the whole 3-act play story arc thing goin' on, and it's not badly acted. Take out the sex, and the film would be about 15 minutes long, so there's no need to worry about too little sex. Each sex scene (there are 5, and they are each distinctive) is fully-realized without excessive camera cuts. There is NO "cheesey outer layer" here. The actors give NO indication that they are performing for the cameras, which is absolutely wonderful.

I found the sex extremely hot for a variety of reasons, not least of which was the utter lack of misogyny found in the vast majority of porn. The bodies were all deliciously lean and toned (NOT stick figures or enormous-breasted "bimbo" types) in a way that says, "I respect myself." Win! However, from a casting perspective, the characters of Violet, Jessie, and Cathy were almost too similar in stature, hair, and tone. Fortunately, it's a look that appeals to me-- especially the impish features of Jiz Lee.

The lack of gender conformity in most of the cast was a bit off-putting to my partner, but I found it refreshing and honest. The visual is not a turn on... but it's not a turn off, either. If that makes any sense. (Whereas the over-the-top airbrushed silicone-enhanced centerfold types do nothing but make me angry at myself for feeling wrinkled and fat and... inferior. Bleh. Get that shit out of my face. It is NOT a turn on.) The integrity IS a turn on. Being yourself in the midst of pressure to conform is huge for me, and something that requires courage and determination.

The drum score added to the tension and its resolution, rather than providing lame techno accompaniment, and it didn't drown out the genuine-sounding vocalizations of the actors. There was never an obviously-faked orgasm, and without a biological penis on the set, no obligatory money shots. Huzzah! The dick was not missed, believe me. Syd Blakovich can drive a strap as well as (or better) than any I've ever seen--and look as sleek and toned as a panther while doing it.

The film was exceptionally well-directed (by Shine Louise Houston) and edited. The fact that the sex scenes ran a little long by conventional, instant-gratification standards only served to make them feel more genuine and satisfying.

Two thumbs up for Champion!

Until next time...

peace & passion,

Here's what Babeland has to say:
For porn that is so much more than just porn, get knocked out by the adult DVD Champion, award-winning director Shine Louise Houston’s latest masterpiece. Don’t get us wrong, this film features plenty of scorching-hot queer sex, but it’s also got a strong, captivating plot. Hotshot martial artist Jessie Easton is training for the fight of her career, yet she’s haunted by past love and current, undeniable attraction to her opponent, Violet Vahn. Throw in some conflict with corrupt nemesis Bobby Malone, and you’ve got an intensely erotic and masterful crossover film. Whether Jessie wins or loses the fight, you’ll be squirming in more ways than one. Please refer to our return policy for this product.
  • Released: 2008
  • Length: 90 minutes
  • Director: Shine Louise Houston
  • Noteworthy Stars: Syd Blakovich, Madison Young, Jiz Lee, Dylan Ryan

Thursday, May 21, 2009


SheaFlex70This post is part product review and part public service announcement. Toys for Tarts does not have a vested (affiliate) interest in this product.

I am a 46-year-old woman with a history of fibromyalgia, depression, and insulin resistance. While my health issues are under control (at times, I believe, tenuously so), I still experience joint pain -- especially when I (over) indulge in the activities I like the most: rowdy sex, taekwondo, hiking, etc.

While in the throes of the worst of my pain-obesity-insomnia-depression cycle, I abused NSAIDs. I would put eight 200mg ibuprofen on my nightstand, pop them when the alarm rang in the morning, then hit the snooze for 20 minutes until they enabled me to get out of bed through the pain. Throughout the day, depending on how many times I would have to lift my children, I'd take up to another dozen tablets. I was afraid to carry my son up or down the stairs for fear that my knees would buckle and I'd drop him. Given that I was lugging around an extra 100# on my own frame, another 20-30 in toddler really made a difference. I took enough NSAIDs over a period of 3-4 years to experience "rebound" inflammation, which makes the pain even worse.

I'm rambling. Sorry. My point is that, due to my history/experience, I'm hesitant to take any drugs these days. I have to HURT before I'll resort to a single tablet. I feel the twinges of despair every time I have an ache that lasts longer than a few hours because I know what chronic pain does to my physical and emotional well-being.

So, when my knees and shoulder started bothering me, I tried the common supplement glucosamine chondroitin. Many people swear by it, but it did nothing for me. I chanced upon a new product while searching online for shea butter products -- skin emollients (another of my fetishes).

This product is a supplement for joint health called SheaFlex70. It is only available via the Walgreen's drugstore chain and online order. It is not cheap. But I was just desperate enough to give it a try. With a $10 off coupon**, I got a month's supply for $30.

Can I just say WOW? I noticed an improvement in the general achey-ness after just 3 days of per-label use. Within a month, the stiffness was GONE. I've since cut back to 1/3 of the dose for maintenance, so the $30 bottle now lasts me 90 days. If I have a particularly strenuous workout, I may re-up the dose for a couple days to keep the inflammation at bay.


Here's what the website says...
SheaFlex70’s patented active ingredient, shea triterpenes, is found within the pit of the fruit of the shea tree, Africa’s “Tree of Life.” SheaFlex70 is the only product available with shea triterpenes, considered nature’s most powerful inflammation fighter.* Shea triterpenes have been proven not only to reduce joint-specific inflammation but also to support Type II collagen, the primary element of the 70% of cartilage that provides structure and smoothness to your joints.*
  • SheaFlex70 dramatically helps relieve joint discomfort and joint-specific inflammation.* When you reduce pain and swelling in the joints, you lay the foundation for getting your body back into balance.
  • SheaFlex70 helps safely reduce the breakdown of the joints’ most abundant collagen, Type II collagen.* Collagen makes up 70% of joint cartilage, which keeps the bones in a joint from rubbing together.
If you give it a try, please leave a comment & let me know how it works for you!

Until next time...

peace & passion,

**Use this code when you buy online and save $10: MMSHEAFLEX

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Gold Digger Vibe

Gold Digger VibeMr. Marcus Gold Digger Vibrator

I will say right now that on receiving this vibe to review I had no idea who Mr. Marcus was, or what his association with Doc Johnson is, seeing as how her name is attached to this product as well. A Google search quickly rectified things, as I discovered Mr. Marcus is an adult film actor. I'll hazard a guess that an adult film actor doesn't truly graduate to "porn star" until he or she has a line of sex toys. Normally one would think their private parts are cast with plaster to mass manufacture dildos and sleeves in some Asian factory, but the Gold Digger has the look of a simple vibe, presumably for beginners.

There are two varieties of the Gold Digger (for some reason I can't get Shirley Bassey's singing voice out of my head, so bear with me): a four-inch and a 6.5-inch. I was given the latter, marked on the package as "Big Daddy's Favorite." Whether Big Daddy prefers to use this on himself or others is not specified, but it is definitely not modeled realistically on any part of any daddy. The black surface is all smooth and soft to the touch—not hard plastic but not quite the squishy silicone I'm used to, either. If you recall my review last year of the Grapevine Vibe, you'll know the texture is the same. As for actual gold, there isn't any—the base of the toy is bejeweled with a bit of "bling" which, though it would look pretty while standing the vibe upright on a table or something—doesn't really do much for the toy's performance. Babeland describes this toy as:
Get your bling on—with minimal investment—thanks to the luxe-looking, super affordable Gold Digger vibrator. Classy golden jewels stud the bottom of the waterproof, velvety plastic shell, and gentle vibrations purr through the variable-speed dial, making this diva-pleaser just as handy for the clit as it is for penetration. Please use a condom for insertion to keep your jewels sitting pretty.
  • Size: 6” x 1-1/4”
  • Material: Hard plastic
  • Volume: 2 out of 5
  • Intensity: 2 out of 5
  • Batteries: Two AA
Batteries are not included, and neither are condoms. I will take issue with the volume rating on this toy because when I did turn it on, I thought it was quite loud for it ssize. Compared to the whisper-buzz of the Grapevine, the Gold Digger sounded like it actually was drilling the ground, even at a low speed.

For penetration, the Gold Digger does offer some satisfaction. The curvature seemed to fit well, providing a nice friction when used. Clitoral stimulation took a bit longer than my usual bullet, but the vibrating sensation inside didn't feel uncomfortable or jarring, inside or out. This having a "velvet"-style exterior, it should definitely be cleaned well after use.

Given its size and price ($20), the Gold Digger would make a good first vibrator for sex toy newbs, or a travel toy for anyone who doesn't want to pack the heavier stuff.

~ Leigh Ellwood

Saturday, May 02, 2009

Sliquid Organics Silk

Sliquid Organics Silk"Organic" things intrigue me. I don't quite understand them--or their allure--but I admit a fascination with the concept. I mean, the dictionary defines organic as "characteristic of, pertaining to, or derived from living organisms." That covers a whole lotta territory, especially if one includes carbon composites -- which, in order to contain dimethicone (a common silicone lubricant) one must. So, organic simply means it was made from living or once-living stuff. Well, that's damned near everything on Earth now, isn't it?

But, be that as it may, organic has never been a selling point for me -- simply because it's such slippery word (which one might consider a good selling point for a lube -- but I digress).

This product is thick and creamy, in both texture and appearance. It's not clear, as are most lubes these days. It looks like jizm, really. It doesn't drip like jizm, though. Stays put in a tidy little dollop. And it has no scent

I thought it had a very faint soapy aftertaste. My partner said it reminded him of sunscreen. We're both probably noticing the taste of the aloe, which is a major (#3) ingredient.

As a lubricant, it worked just fine with The Boss. It's non-staining, water-based, and water-soluble, so I didn't have to worry about if or where it went. And, since I tested solo, I didn't have to bother my pretty little head about that pesky aftertaste. I wouldn't reach for this product if oral sex was on the menu, though. It's not baaaaaaaad, mind you. Hell, I've tasted more soap on people who haven't, perhaps, rinsed thoroughly. The action still happens, but there's an unnecessary distraction. Y'know? Why introduce distractions?

If it matters to you, the label says the ingredients are Vegan (yes, with a capital V) and most (but not all) of them have a little asterisks indicating they're "certified organic."

The label also says it's hypoallergenic, which is another one of those slippery words. It means, "No one's allergic to this... unless they are." Anytime you have organic ingredients, there is the potential for allergic reaction. Period.

So, given that most of the product's claims are not all that important to me, I still give it a positive review on form, function, and (lack of) friction. If "organic" and "Vegan" (with a capital V) and "hypoallergenic" are important to you, then you might want to give it a try!

Until next time...

peace & passion,

Here's what Babeland has to say:

Go green (without sacrificing silkiness and staying power) with Sliquid Organics Silk lubricant. This water-based lube contains 12% hypoallergenic silicone for a creamy texture that lasts and lasts, making Sliquid Organics Silk a great choice for delicate, sensitive tissues. The earth- and body-friendly formula also contains organic extracts like soothing aloe vera, healing vitamin E, and invigorating green tea and hibiscus. The texture is similar to the standard Sliquid Silk. As always, Sliquid lubes are glycerin-free and paraben-free. And once you’ve made your way through the bottle, it’s 100% recyclable. Not for use with silicone toys.

  • Size: 4-1/5 ounces, 8-1/2 ounces
  • Formula Base: Water, silicone
  • Ingredients: Purified Water, Plant Cellulose (from Cotton), Aloe Barbadensis*, Natural Tocopherols (Vitamin E), Extracts of Hibiscus*, Flax*, Green Tea* & Sunflower Seed*, Isopropyl Palmitate, Polysorbate 20, Dimethicone, Emollient Ester, Phenoxyethanol (Rose Ether)
*Organic botanical extracts are independently certified by Quality Certification Services in compliance with the USDA National Organic Program.

Friday, May 01, 2009

The Boss

The BossThe Boss was awaiting my return from the Romantic Times BookLovers Convention in Orlando. Great, I thought! A Fun Factory exclusive from Babeland. An orgasmic win-win!

The first thing I noticed was that it was packaged in a Babeland box with ZERO instructions on how to open the battery compartment and insert the AA batteries. Fail. I had to go to the Fun Factory website, find a similar product, and download its PDF user guide in order to figure it out -- because it is NOT obvious. For a high-end ($58) product, that's damned near unforgivable.

I got over that annoyance and moved on to the fun part...

Given its girth, I tested this toy along with Sliquid Organics Silk (reviewed separately).

The Boss I received is black & grey, not the (seemingly) requisite sex-toy-purple. It's a bit longer AND girthier than I gathered from the photos. Perhaps a visual is in order. See how it stacks up to my Hitachi? The Boss is a big pleasure puppy. I've known guys this big, but they're few & far between (and quite often lousy lovers, thinking their impressive equipment is all they need to please a partner). It's heavy, too. The shaft is silicone and somewhat floppy--kinda like an 80% erection. It'll go in without bending, but there's more flexibility there than with a raging boner.

The end cap is rigid with a knob that turns to adjust the strength of the vibration. It's not easy to manipulate when slippery-wet, but it's not likely to be changed unintentionally, either. Even at its highest setting, the vibration is nothing to write home about, but coupled with the aforementioned girthiness, it gets the job done in relatively short order.

As a g-spot toy, I didn't appreciate it. I found that I enjoyed The Boss externally as much as, perhaps more than, inserted. The vibrations, while strongest at the base of the shaft, are well conducted throughout its length. Thus, I was able to stimulate myself from bow to stern without even moving the toy. It wasn't easy to grip this way, especially when lubed, but movement wasn't absolutely necessary to be effective.

Until next time...

peace & passion,

Here's what Babeland has to say:
Let Babeland be The Boss, with our exclusive new Fun Factory vibrator. This is the G-spot vibrator we have always dreamed of letting take control! Finally a realistically-shaped silicone insertable vibrator with a strong, localized internal buzz. We wanted The Boss to be hefty (check), soft silicone (yep), and with a sweet tilt just right for the G-spot (it is!). Add in the shower-friendly splashproof shell and vibrant Fun Factory colors, and you’ve got a toy which will put you in your place and show you who's The Boss, every time! Color may vary. Available only at Babeland!
  • Size: 8-3/4” x 1-3/5”
  • Material: Silicone
  • Volume: 2 out of 5
  • Intensity: 3 out of 5
  • Batteries: Two AA

May is National Masturbation Month!

And kicking it off with a bang is the annual Masturbate-a-thon to benefit the Center for Sex and Culture. (Donations ARE tax deductible, by the way.)

Clipped from the site:

3PM, Saturday, May 2nd

The Center for Sex & Culture
1519 Mission St., San Francisco
(Between S. Van Ness & 11th)

Order Your Voyeur Audience Tickets Now!
Click Here For Details

Support the Masturbate-a-thon
Donate Now


We are still seeking Featured Masturbators this year (who can be pledged ahead of time and followed on the webcast), and we will have Voyeur Seating available as well as Private Public Space (where people can masturbate who do not wish to be seen on the webcast). We hope to see you -- or be seen by you! -- on May 2nd, this year's Live San Francisco Masturbate-a-Thon!

Check out the 2008 Masturbate-a-thon records. Can you beat them at home or at the event?

Attention Competitors
If you plan on challenging the World Record for Time you must be present by 10:30am PST to make the start.

Why Masturbate? Why Masturbate-a-thon?

Despite great strides in sex-positive education, masturbation for many remains a taboo subject.

We believe:

  • Masturbation is the safest sex.
  • More masturbation means more sexual self-awareness.
  • Masturbation with a partner can be educational and hot.

Tuesday, April 07, 2009

ID Moments

ID MomentsTo counterbalance to yesterday's unfavorable lube review, we have ID Moments. As lubricants go, this one's a clear winner! It's taken a place of honor on the nightstand next to the O'My (Cherry) and the K-Y Touch Massage Warming.

It's colorless, water-based/water-soluble, glycerin & paraben-free, latex compatible, and sweetened only with sucralose. Yay! Like most water-based lubes, it's on the thinnish side. Reapplication is likely to be needed for extended play. That's its only drawback, and it's a minor one.

Although it's not labeled as having any particular scent or flavor, to both me & my partner, it smelled lightly (and quite pleasantly) of green apples and was as close to tasteless as any lube I've ever tried. That's a big plus in my book. I don't want a product to be a turn off on the tongue.

Two thumbs up for ID Moments!

Until next time...

peace & passion,

Monday, April 06, 2009

Probe Thick & Rich

Probe Thick & RichI'm always interested in selling points for lubricants, how they're marketed. I mean, do they boast scent or no scent, flavor or no flavor, silicone, water-soluble, organic, "all natural" (whatever THAT means), with or without glycerin, etc.?

So this product's claim to be "laboratory formulated to mimic the body's own lubrication" intrigued me. Do I want that? Really? Does anyone? I mean, my body's own lubrication--while certainly slippery and delightful in its own way--is not anywhere near as durable as what comes out of a bottle. Granted, it's self-replenishing (if all is going well, anyway), but if limited to one application, it would not hold up nearly as well as the supplementary stuff.

Probe Thick & Rich also claims to use grapefruit seed extract as its preservative. I assume that's geared toward those who are skittish about all those multisyllabic chemical preservatives. Okay, I can understand that. The fewer multisyllabic chemicals, the better.

This product is water-based/water-soluble and latex compatible. It felt a bit thin/runny to me. Strike one. When you squirt it on something--be it a body part or a toy--you'd like it to stay put long enough to get the gooey goodness where it needs to go.

So, my dear partner and I proceeded to put it through its preliminary paces: apply to skin (back of hands), smear around, smell, taste. I was pleased to discover that it is as odorless and tasteless as any lube I've ever sampled. So far, so good. I really don't want products that interfere with oral sex. I'd rather taste the person, y'know?

Label says glycerin is an ingredient, so I won't try it vaginally. No sugars go inside. Why invite infection, eh? Strike two.

I squirted a big dollop into my palm and rubbed my hands together, preparing to do a little massage. When I pulled my hands apart, the lube stretched in hundreds of tiny strings between my palms. Yuck! It was like spider webs. No way in hell was I was putting THAT on my pink parts. STRIKE THREE!!!

This product went straight to the trash. Use at your own risk. Don't say I didn't warn you.

Until next time...

peace & passion,

~ Alessia

Sunday, April 05, 2009


BloomyI typically adore Fun Factory products. They're funky, irreverent, yet serious in their intent to deliver pleasure. And they're 100% silicone, which makes cleanup simpler. So, it was with great anticipation that I requested Bloomy to review.

As a butt toy, which is how Bloomy is primarily marketed, this product fulfills its mission admirably. It's not too big and not too small. It's not too smooth and not too bumpy. It's not too rigid and not too floppy for the butt. Its "tongue" provides perfectly placed perineal stimulation, especially with a bit of lubricant (natural or otherwise). And it's got an ideal finger-ring handle for solo play or for the convenience of a partner who multi-tasks (as all good partners should).

Bloomy can also be used vaginally. (As always, sterilize toys before and after use -- especially when previously used anally. Silicone can be boiled, bleached, or put in the dishwasher. Hibiclens is another option. Can't be TOO careful. Use a condom over toys when shared or when in doubt of their cleanliness.) Bloomy is a bit too floppy for my tastes as a vaginal toy, but it does connect well with both g-spot and clitoris, and its smooth surface feels quite yummy. Some foks add an egg vibrator in the finger ring (which is too big for a standard bullet), but that does remove the functionality of the ring as a grip. I didn't care for that approach vaginally or anally.

My recommendation? Buy Bloomy for your anal arsenal. If it happens to also trip your (or your partner's) pussy triggers, all the better.

Until next time...

peace & passion,

Here's what Babeland has to say:

The only thing better than a beautiful sex toy is a beautiful sex toy with multiple functions, and the Bloomy leads the pack in both categories. Pliable, body-friendly silicone loops and swirls into a delicate bloom shape that’s perfect for G-spot or prostate stimulation. Try it as a dildo, a PC muscle exerciser, or a butt plug... it might even do the grocery shopping if you’re nice to it. Seriously, we’re head-over-heels for this versatile, gorgeously designed toy from Fun Factory.
  • Size: 3-1/4” x 1-1/3”
  • Material: Silicone

Friday, April 03, 2009

Waaaaay better than Altoids!

Yukon Jack Perma Frost SchnappsSensation play. Nooner. Word.

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Sex Casino

Sex CasinoIt's Las Vegas in your bedroom!

With one die bearing a noun (body part) and the other a verb (lick, suck, tickle, etc.), every roll of the dice results in pleasure. Spin the dial for some erotic instructions. Play strip pok-her. Let the chips fall where they may! The possibilities are endless.

I took this set of suggestive Sex Casino games with me to a recent gathering of hedonists and, while we didn't play any of the suggested variations, we did have a helluva good time creating new ones.

Great for an uninhibited party or an intimate soiree, I bet (*poke* Bet. Get it?) you'll never get tired of the many ways to cash in on this game.

Until next time...

peace & passion,

Here's what Babeland has to say:
Spin, bet, roll and romp your way to a scorching good time with Sex Casino adult game. Sex Casino includes everything you need to turn your bedroom into a pleasure mecca: playing cards with sexual favor betting chips, naughty dice, scratch-and-win sex lotto cards, a sexy spinner game, and a manual that describes 25 provocative games. Remember: you can’t win if you don’t play! And the best part is that whether you win or lose, you’re definitely going to get lucky. Makes a perfect gift for your favorite bachelor, bachelorette, or friend, or bring it home for a weekend-long date at home with your partner.

Saturday, March 21, 2009

The Smart Girl’s Guide to the G-Spot

The Smart Girl’s Guide to the G-SpotViolet Blue's writing always makes for an enjoyable read, and this book is no exception. Literate, intelligent, witty, and irreverent, The Smart Girl's Guide to the G-Spot conveys in-depth information about a woman's anatomy, the mechanics of arousal and orgasm, and the wide variety of ways by which women can be pleasured. It is presented in a accessible and totally non-threatening way that won't have even the most vanilla of readers shying away from its message.

Two things I particularly like about Violet's books: (1) she never comes across as judgmental about one's sexual triggers or lack thereof, and (2) she does an excellent job of advising folks who might be intimidated by the prospect of introducing a new sexual scenario into a relationship. Regardless of the scenario in question, these two things effectively empower the reader.

I learned a thing or two, and I've been intimately acquainted with my g-spot for years.

Interspersed with the no-nonsense advice are four erotic short stories by Alison Tyler, which I consider a delightful bonus.

Until next time...

peace & passion,

Saturday, March 14, 2009

Bill & Desiree: Love Is Timeless

Bill & Desiree
When Bill asked me to do this review, I first let out a "Whoop!" then responded with an enthusiastic "Hell, yes!" email. Of course, he couldn't hear the shout, but I hope my enthusiasm came through the words on the screen. I've been intensely curious about Comstock Films since I first became aware of them, and I intended to acquire & review each -- just had never made the time. I had watched each of the previews on the website and was virtually paralyzed with indecision on which title to do first. Thankfully, Bill decided for me.

This film is a perfect example of the difference between the erotic and the pornographic (which is, incidentally, a subject I've been attempting to discuss on Squidoo). While the subject matter is undoubtedly adult and delightfully explicit, it is definitely not porn. Watching a committed couple have sex -- make love, if that's the terminology preferred -- is far, far different than the choreographed artificiality and staged cum shots of the typical porn fare. It is both titillating and empowering, something that can't be said about any adult film I've ever seen... until now.

The most striking aspect of this documentary-style feature is the wondrous awe with which both Bill & Desiree approach each other and their sex. They not only get off together, they have bawdy, uninhibited FUN while doing it. Everyone should be blessed with such a relationship! Intermingled with the soft sighs and orgasmic moans, there is giggling and grinning. The clear adoration in Bill's expression makes this DVD worth its weight in gold.

In fact, although I'm not suggesting anyone do so, this is precisely the type of positive portrayal that youth should have as their first exposure to sex and relationships.  Ever wonder what the world would be like if our first impressions of "ideal" sex weren't formed by unrealisitically-proportioned bodies being objectified or completely degraded? Unfortunately, it takes people decades to overcome the stigma of "perfection" in both their bodies and their sex lives. Some -- both women and men -- never do, and that's a damned shame.

The sex is incredibly hot and incredibly fun, and getting to know Bill & Desiree through the candid interview is the icing on this pleasure cake.  Beautiful people sharing a beautiful love story. Kudos to Comstock Films!

peace & passion,

~ ~ ~

Bill & Desiree: Love is Timeless is the latest installment in director Tony Comstock's award-winning Real People, Real Life, Real Sex series of erotic documentaries.

Bill and Desiree's story starts in the second half of life: a chance meeting, a powerful attraction, a carnal connection, and a deep, sensual love. Through an intimate and lively interview, we hear the story of how Bill and Desiree met, and what drew them to each other. When we witness the playful intensity of their beautifully photographed lovemaking, we see that pleasure is ageless, and that love is indeed timeless!

Bill & Desiree: Love is Timeless is a film about passion, about desire; a film that gives older lovers a reason to celebrate, and younger lovers something to look forward to. Bill & Desiree: Love is Timeless is a film that invites us to re-imagine what love can be and should be in our later years.

Thursday, March 12, 2009

Annie Sprinkle’s Amazing World of Orgasm

Annie Sprinkle’s Amazing World of OrgasmI'm not sure what I expected from this DVD, but what I got definitely was not it. It's been touted as a "must see" for those wishing to learn more about orgasm. I disagree. Totally. I suppose if I could figure out the target audience, I might be able to pen a more favorable review. I don't think those who are having trouble reaching orgasm will derive much benefit from the information shared. In fact, it would intimidate many, especially more vanilla folk (who often seem to be most in need of accurate, practical information). And I don't think those who simply seek more and/or better orgasms will benefit either.

The novice is not going to find reassurance or practical tips beyond the "go with the flow" message. The advice is not bad, mind you; it's just recycled. The expert is just going to shrug and say, "Well, duh."

The best I can say about this 2004 film is that it does well in capturing the diversity of approach to orgasm. To that end, it succeeds almost too well because the diversity of its cast is more intriguing than the advice provided.
Annie Sprinkle’s Amazing World of Orgasm (back cover)There were a couple too-brief segments which attempted to define various types of orgasm that I found interesting, but on the whole, I thought the production was rather disorganized. Add to that the distracting, new-agey graphics, and the whole 53-minute thing was difficult to endure. It's not going to win any awards for editing, direction, sound, or special effects. That's for damned sure.

Orgasm is undoubtedly a multi-faceted beast. It can be physical, emotional, or spiritual (or any combination of the three), and I don't think any form of orgasm instruction would be complete without addressing those aspects. However, this film focuses too heavily on the spiritual, almost to the exclusion of the actual mechanics of orgasm, to be of any instructional value.

peace & passion,

Sunday, February 22, 2009


PeridiseThe latest toy I've enjoyed reviewing is a markedly different type of sexual aid called the Aneros Peridise.

These Unisex Anal PC Toys are unique and are available in different sizes and shapes. They are made of a rigid white plastic polymer, are completely waterproof, and are latex and phthalate free.

The Peridise Advanced Pack contains two Peridise toys. These particular toys measure 4 inches in length, the larger having a 2.5 inch circumference while the thinner is 2 inches.

Unlike other anal toys, you are supposed to begin with the larger of the two and then work your way down. In this case, the thinner the toy, the more intense the orgasm.

The original intent of this toy was medicinal, designed as a way to use the healing power of massage in the anal-rectal region. And it does indeed promote the health of this area with invigorating benefits and increased blood flow.

But scientists soon realized an unexpected benefit. The large number of nerve endings and muscles in the anus combined with the action of peristalsis (organized muscle contractions that occur throughout the digestive tract) created very pleasurable sensations and, interestingly, much stronger orgasms.

Hurray for science!

Anally erotic as I am, I couldn't wait to give these things a try.

I decided to use the Peridise in solo play only, Sarah's Happy Time. Anal is not for everyone and this type of play can be a very personal thing.

Additionally, these toys are extremely rigid, and perhaps aren't really designed to be used in tandem with your partner occupying your other orifice. Ahem.

So after ensuring cleanliness and applying some lube, I slowly inserted the larger of the two. Partially. Just the tip. This is the purpose of this specialty toy.

After minimal insertion, you're supposed to relax and allow your body's natural reactions to take over. It was almost maddening for me to stop at this point so I decided to add a bit of vibrator play. That worked for awhile but soon I could feel fluctuations and the beginning waves of anal contractions.

With a bit of clenching and relaxing, a sort of tug of war game ensued with my parts, and I found myself in an unexpected but powerful orgasm.

The Peridise moves by itself along with your own body movements. It's possible to draw the tool in and out with your own muscles, adding to the pleasurable sensations. You'll feel your anus unconsciously reacting, adding lovely little twinges and miniature orgasms and soon the peristaltic waves will become stronger and more rapid.

With practice, you'll have further control. And the unique shapes of the Peridise toys will have differing pleasurable effects. And stronger orgasms.

It's a specialty tool designed for experienced anal play, and I must confess I've yet to share it with my partner. But it's well worth the effort to develop the skills.

~ Sarah Rose

Here's what Babeland has to say:

Come one, come all with the superlative all-orgasms-intensified, all-genders-satisfied Peridise anal plugs. No one knows your butt—and how to please it—better than Aneros, and they’ve sculpted two sets of plugs sure to find your sweet spot comfortably and easily: just gripping the Peridise induces involuntary contractions in the anal muscle, generating regional orgasms (buttgasms?), or intensifying traditional orgasms for men and women. Get two larger plugs in the beginner set, and two smaller plugs in the Advanced (stronger muscles can grip a smaller toy). Insertion is easy with the thoughtfully tapered head, and the design allows for easy movement and a comfortable hands-free and wearable fit.

  • Size/Beginner: 4" x 3/5", 4" x 4/5"
  • Size/Advanced: 3-3/4” x 7/10”, 3-3/4" x 9/10"
  • Material: Hard plastic