Saturday, September 27, 2008


My partner took one look at this cordless, rechargeable, silicone & plastic Fun Factory product and dubbed it Shamu. And judging from the--Wait for it!--whale of a good time I had testing it, I'd have to agree. Shamu, it is.

The fact that I got all hot & bothered merely doing a Google image search for a picture of its namesake is an indicator of this toy's effectiveness. I now have a fetish for marine mammals thanks to this product. It is--by far--the most effective dual-stimulating g-spot/clitoral vibrator I've tested TO DATE. (Yes, toy vendors/manufacturers, that IS a gauntlet.)

The design is ingenious, the curves perfectly formed. Every push pulls and every pull pushes. It's like an orgasmic teeter-totter without the splinters.

The storage case/charger is discreet enough to leave on your nightstand (or coffee table) without drawing attention. The toy itself is very aesthetically pleasing, and if your toddler happens to snatch (no pun intended) it and plunk it on the dinner table along with GI John and Caribou Barbie, no one will bat an eyelash.

The controls--lit by glowing red LEDs--are easily visible in the dark and positioned such that they're readily accessible without being prone to inadvertent change. There are multiple levels of vibration. I counted 9 levels of steady vibrations and 3 pulsing speeds, and it's relatively quiet-ish. I really couldn't hear it over my whale-song modulating moaning. *eep* I noticed no power loss during a prolonged dive, either.

I believe I just had a mini-gasm simply thinking about this toy in conjunction with anal sex. Yeah, it's expensive... but, great-killer-marine-mammals Batman!, it's worth every wet cent.

Until next time...

peace & passion,

Here's what Babeland has to say:

Invite Delight into your bedroom, with this beautifully-sculpted new vibrator. Designed to please the body as well as the eyes, the Delight practically guides itself to your favorite pleasure points, surrounding your G-spot or clitoris with powerful sensations. The Delight recharges easily while sitting in its Babeland-branded carrying case, and is available in three gorgeous colors. From the makers of our bestselling line of silicone vibrators, this Fun Factory toy also features 32 different vibration options, plus an ultra-ergonomic handle. Water-resistant. Constructed of water-resistant plastic and silicone. Delight is one of the Babeland All Stars! Please refer to our return policy for this product.

  • Size: 4" x 1-3/4" (insertable)
  • Material: Silicone and plastic
  • Volume: 2 out of 5
  • Intensity: 3 out of 5
  • Batteries: Recharges in case
And here's what the manufacturer's website reveals:
With »Delight« you will enter a new universe of lust!

This new vibrator combines exterior stimulation with simultaneous insertable function.

It is convincing, not only due to its breathtaking looks, but also because it combines precious elegance with fabulous functionality.

The small and estethic sculpture comes with a slightly bent tip for G-Spot stimulation. A little knob that is placed on the silicone part of »Delight« will – intensified with vibration - excite for extra pleasures.

1. The curl is held with two fingers.
2. Illuminated controls are easy to operate with one's thumb.
3. An extra bump stimulates clitoris
4. Made from 100% medical grade silicone, hook tickles the G-Spot.
5. Sides made from smooth, shiny, skin-friendly plastic.
6. Carrying case: Is both a travel box and recharger.

Thursday, September 25, 2008

Leather Hood with Zip Eyes and Mouth

Leather Hood with Zip Eyes & MouthYou gotta check out Snarling Misanthrope's review of this product posted on the Eden Fantasys site. It's both informative and hilarious. A snippet, for example:
DURABILITY. It seems to be fairly sturdy. Through the course of testing, it has thus far stood up admirably to the following activities:
  • groveling
  • kneeling
  • begging
  • coitus
  • ass-coitus
  • omelet-making


Sunday, September 14, 2008

Fetish Fleamarket

I had fun yesterday at The Crucible's Leather Fleamarket & Play Party 17 in DC. From 11am 'til 6pm, I sold books & schmoozed ... and shopped! I didn't stay for the play party ('cause I had a 4-hour drive ahead of me), but from the demonstrations on the exhibit floor, it was shaping up to be a verrrrrrry intriguing event.

The vendors were super nice. I picked up a very pretty deer hide flogger from DeTailsToys along with a couple other trinkets.

peace & passion,

Thursday, September 04, 2008

PSA: Toxic Toys

I've had this post languishing in draft for many months, unmotivated to publish it primarily because the information is already available from numerous other sources. These days, every respectable online sex toy vendor has at least one page dedicated to information about the composition of the products it sells. For example, Babeland's starts here. A quick Google search produces a plethora of hits. I've posted the link to Violet Blue's most excellent article before, and I'm sure I will again. Wikipedia has an entry here.

But something happened last night that made me go Ewwww! and I think it only serves to emphasize all the warnings floating around about what's in some of the cheaper products folks stick in their bodies.

Damned near every toy carries the instruction to store it "a cool, dry place" after proper cleaning. I mean, it's so common that it doesn't even register any more. Our eyes just pass over it, unseeing. However, being the meticulous person that I am (STOP LAUGHING!), I've always followed this advice. I don't store my sex toys in the refrigerator (unless I'm chilling my Njoy) or the oven or in a vat of disinfectant. I have a breathable--but lockable--storage drawer (a steel gun locker, actually) in which I keep my toys.

Anyway, I opened it last night to put away some recent acquisitions, and when I happened to touch one particular dildo, it was slimy. My first thought was that I had a lube spill somewhere. Nope. Upon closer inspection, I discovered that the toy itself was... oozing. Now, this was a large, jelly dong that I don't recall buying. I think maybe it came with a harness or something. Maybe I got it as a gift. That particular detail is lost in the recesses of my sex-addled memory. However, I do know I never used/tested it (because it was HUGE and I'm just not a size queen). It was stored in "a cool, dry place" and yet it was bleeding, leaking some unknown & presumably toxic substance.

I immediately tossed it in the trash, pausing only briefly to consider the environmental impact of its disposal. The thought of having that inside me made me sick to my stomach. When the nausea abated, I returned to my toy box and checked everything else. Fortunately, there were no other casualties.

In the coming weeks, I'm going to check each of the vendors with whom Toys for Tarts is affiliated. If I do not find a page on their site with information on materials and safety, I am going to contact them with a request that they create one. If, within a reasonable amount of time, they do not, I am going to sever the affiliation. Toys for Tarts will not support vendors (even if paid a pittance to do so) that knowingly put sales before safety. Readers are encouraged to comment here to share their related experiences with various vendors.

I will leave you with some simple advice:
  1. Know the composition of the products you're using as well as how to safely use, clean, and store them.
  2. If a vendor or manufacturer does not disclose the material from which a product is made, DON'T BUY IT.
  3. If you are unsure about the composition of a product already in your arsenal, either replace it or use a safe barrier (such as a condom) when playing with it.
  4. Pass this information along.

Until next time...

peace & passion,